Details Epithetical Books Different Loving: A Complete Exploration of the World of Sexual Dominance and Submission

Title:Different Loving: A Complete Exploration of the World of Sexual Dominance and Submission
Author:Gloria G. Brame
Book Format:Paperback
Book Edition:Anniversary Edition
Pages:Pages: 560 pages
Published:January 13th 1996 by Villard (first published 1993)
Categories:Erotica. BDSM. Nonfiction. Sexuality. Adult Fiction. Adult. Reference. Gender and Sexuality
Books Different Loving: A Complete Exploration of the World of Sexual Dominance and Submission Free Download
Different Loving: A Complete Exploration of the World of Sexual Dominance and Submission Paperback | Pages: 560 pages
Rating: 3.93 | 789 Users | 42 Reviews

Representaion To Books Different Loving: A Complete Exploration of the World of Sexual Dominance and Submission

Different loving is a rather innocuous title. Why did I not know of this book when I was first getting into BDSM? Had I read this book when I was 18, when the book came out in ’93, life would have been less confusing for me in a sexual manner. Many of the questions I’ve had over the years are all listed and explained very well in this book. While this 1996 version is dated with some of the terminology as far as transgenderism, the others terms are still used prevalently throughout the BDSM subculture.

This book is laid out in a format easy to read. Each chapter highlight the history of the specific fetish or topic. There are explanations, safety factors and popular misconceptions dispelled. Then there are interviews which give a practical personal side of each topic. The groupings of the book make a lot of sense too. There are seven sections:

1. Different Loving
2. Imagination and Desire
3. The Pleasures of Discomfort
4. Individualizing the Body
5. Translocations of Desire
6. Masculine and Feminine
7. Fluid Mysteries

The twenty six chapters will provide a very good foundation for new to BDSM as far as common fetishes, terminology and popular desires. There are some things that even those who have been around BDSM for a while may find benefit in reviewing.

From an educational standpoint, this book is very good and I wished I had read it close to 20 years ago. I wonder how my sexual fumbling would have been different. I think the most reassuring part of this book is that I’m not alone and there are others who are like me and they won’t judge. From an entertainment or “wow” value, this book is rather dull. It’s not meant for titillating discourse for shock value. Nor does it have pictures. It definitely isn’t a book used as a how to manual. Instead, it’s more of a “how did this come about” and “what it is that we do” (WIITWD).

Nonetheless, there were certain things in the book which called out to me. In Chapter 2 - Victorian Genesis and the Modern Scene, William Hammond, U.S. Surgeon General, said that nine tenths of the time decent women had no pleasure from intercourse and the famous Swiss gynecologist, Dr. Fehling, called sexual desire in young women pathological - Arno Karlen (p. 22). All I can say to this is that these men are terrible lovers if their women don’t experience pleasure from intercourse. The Victorian error highlights “Modesty and restraint were unquestioned virtues. Proper gentlemen and ladies of the period eschewed strong emotion...The appearance of respectability was paramount. To appear otherwise was to be common, and to be common was to be spiritually flawed, economically hopeless, and socially repugnant.”

This is a very key concept to realize. In the society we live now, we are still very concerned about how we are perceived. Social status is incredibly important to many people. If we are to understand that sexuality, passion and a joie de vie is considered lower status, it makes sense to have all these sexually repressed people afraid to buck society norms. Rather depressing, is it not?

One interviewee stated “I started suppressing my S/m fantasies. I found that it's like a bubble in water. You suppress it, the bubble pops up; you push the bubble down, it stays down a little longer, [then] comes up about twice as fast.” (p. 39). This I have experienced firsthand to my chagrin.

Moving to Chapter 3 with ABCs of D&S, S/M is not a matter of activity nor of degree: It's a matter of intention (p. 68). I believe this is a quote I’m going to need to add. It is so very true for me. I find that so many times, even outside of BDSM, it’s the intention which makes all the difference in the world. This leads us directly into Chapter 5 with Head Trips and Roleplaying. When you're involved in S&M, it opens your eyes to a lot of differences. [S&M] makes you a more tolerant person (p. 121). I can not say this is true for all BDSM lifestylers. I can attest this is true for me. I’m positive this is true for me because when I was younger, people never confided in me or if they did, I may have been their last resort. My world was black and white. I saw very few colours and shades of grey only caused me to curl my lip in scorn. As I entered my late teens and early twenties, my exploration into the alternative lifestyle changed my attitudes which rippled out to the rest of my life. I’m sure it would be a shock to my extremely religious parents to find out my attitude improvement stemmed from my sexual freedom.

This is a random note, but did you know there used to be whipping brothels (p. 257)? Dedicated brothels to whipping and flogging which were very lucrative. There were professional dominatrixes for centuries. It’s interesting to note that many of the religious sects which require celibacy, these members would subvert their sexual desires with floggings and self flagellations. So many comment, so unprofessional so I will keep quiet.
In Chapter 13 with Intense Stimulation, one of the items mentioned is the cock ring. Of course, since I’m Chinese, this had to be mentioned. Cock rings are descendent of the ancient Chinese silver penis claspe whose "purpose was to prolong erection by preventing hte blood from leaving the engorged organ." (p. 281) Seriously? The Chinese? What else did we invent??

The body modification chapters were interesting in the history and the societal impacts. In Chapter 16 Tattooing is covered. On Easter Island genital tattooing of a woman once denoted that she had been seen copulating with a man by another man. Others were rite of passage. Women w/o genital tattooing giving birth, the children were put to death (p 322). Let this be a lesson – never assume what the tattoo or lack of tattoo means.
As I’m finishing up this very long review, I had to comment on Chapter 23 Erotic Combat and Gender Heroics. Male wrestling - and particularly the nude male wrestling of ancient Greece - has often been asserted to have homoerotic appeal (p. 469) Seriously? They have to call this out specifically? I thought everyone knew this.

We finally come to my favourite end, Chapter 26 Enemas. Klismaphilia is the eroticization of enemas. Who knew enemas were considered part of the water sports family. It’s a sub-fetish, if you will. I guess I need to clarify my hard and soft limits again. This book is recommended to those just starting out, exploring the BDSM subculture and want validation that they are not alone.


Specify Books In Pursuance Of Different Loving: A Complete Exploration of the World of Sexual Dominance and Submission

Original Title: Different Loving: The World of Sexual Dominance and Submission
ISBN: 0679769560 (ISBN13: 9780679769569)
Edition Language: English


Rating Epithetical Books Different Loving: A Complete Exploration of the World of Sexual Dominance and Submission
Ratings: 3.93 From 789 Users | 42 Reviews

Weigh Up Epithetical Books Different Loving: A Complete Exploration of the World of Sexual Dominance and Submission
DryI found a few pieces interesting here and there but for the most part the book bored me to tears. It was like someone was explaining something that have zero passion about. It also seemed incomplete. There were many chapters that could have been pared-down or combined to make room for more interesting topics and finishing touches. Don't get me wrong, I can listen to someone talk about dirt for an hour if they are excited about it but this lacked and engaging aspect.

Different loving is a rather innocuous title. Why did I not know of this book when I was first getting into BDSM? Had I read this book when I was 18, when the book came out in 93, life would have been less confusing for me in a sexual manner. Many of the questions Ive had over the years are all listed and explained very well in this book. While this 1996 version is dated with some of the terminology as far as transgenderism, the others terms are still used prevalently throughout the BDSM

This work is a great look into the BDSM world. It gives real-life examples and situations of both Dominates and Submissives. I highly recommend it to people new to the lifestyle.

Good primer on BDSM, Fetish, D/s. Interviews by Brame. Must have for BDSM bookshelf, but keep in mind this is not a 'how-to' but a 'why' type of book.

If your interested in all the BDSM fetishes and terminology this is the book to read. It has several interviews with people that give their take on the mental aspects of it and how their fetish makes them feel. Deeper understanding of BDSM.

THE best book on sexual role playing ever written. Not that I've read that many. Just a few dozen.....

a little dated but very thorough and informative for kink and vanilla folk alike.

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